Noel Ellis's Official Blog

I wield the pen to explore the vastness of the human mind

Month: June 2017

SIXTY SIX MIXED FEELINGS

http://gtheal.com/?marakanr=taurus-male-and-virgo-female-dating&42f=05 Mama I don’t want to go to office today was the first thing that came to my mind as the alarm rang this morning. I was feeling uncomfortable, miserable and down. The feeling was the same when after the term break one had to go for the first muster. I remember we used to count DLTGH, cutting away, smudging those dates in our diaries, on our tables, inside our drawers, behind every note book of which ever subject we had. It used to be a dilemma that should I cut today’s date tomorrow morning or should I cut it today itself. On the way back to NDA one got that kind of eerie feeling which I had while going to office today. Never in my life have I felt so home sick. We used to dread to get to NDA especially in those “faded OG” TATA busses. How we used to rush to get a seat on the newer type ones. That feeling which used to come moment Khadakwasla used to come in sight was the feeling that came afresh after ages. I want to start striking off dates for the next one today onwards, hopefully on a cruise. I shall be there with my wife and daughter for sure.

Friends, I took an additional day leave after coming here as the hangover of the dose of friendship, camaraderie, bonhomie, fellowship, association, love and bonding we shared was still fresh in my brains. The laughter which roared from every group if calculated in terms of energy released could have flown the “Tejas” to Pakistan, decimated it and come back. If we packed the good vibrations of that cheer in forms of bombs and attach them to Sukoi’s we could devastate our enemies with a force greater than the nuclear bombs which fell on Japan. The atmosphere was so strong in positive energy that words cannot fathom. I was falling short of words because I did not want the event to end. I know what the organisers would have gone through weaving such an experience for us. Notwithstanding the pressure on them and the nitty-gritty’s being meticulously looked into. The man who took the onus to organise it deserves a grand kudos. All that followed was the true espirit-de-corps of being part of the great course called 66. A grand salute to every course mate who attended and his family for enriching our lives. At least 10 years have been added for sure.

cheap albenza side It was first time in my life that I was claimed by two squadrons equally in this get together. When I was told to leave Charlie squadron ages back, my heart weighed a ton but could not help it. India Squadron became my second home thanks to my course mates. I remember the way I was welcomed in India Squadron. It was evening tea time; the hustle and bustle was at its peak as the cadets were reporting back from term break. Appointments were already in, so were people like me who were on restrictions, plus there were some like “Kathpalia” who had come for GCI. Cabin allotted to me was on the ante-room side facing the parade ground. His cabin was the corner cabin in line as the bathroom. I was walking with my mug of tea into my cabin when I heard, hey you! I gave a dirty look and went inside. As I was about sip my tea in that red plastic mug there was a fanatic knock on the door. You bloody Bas***d, didn’t you hear me, wake me up at 4.30 tomorrow morning. I opened the door; I was in my gown and nothing else underneath. You Fu***r don’t you know me, as I opened the cabin door. I said no I don’t and go and hop for all I care. His rage and fury knew no bounds, come outside and start rolling you son of a glitch. I shut the door again and sat down to have my tea. By then due to the commotion CQ and CSM landed up and told him, yaar he is a fifth not a second termer and mind you he has been sent here after being duly marched up to COM for the charge of manhandling. Kathpalia made me his pal instantly and offered to wake me up whenever it was convenient to me. I lived in peace ever after.

buy erythromycin for fish Well, nostalgia creeps all over me as I have yet to come to terms that the get together is over. Thank you my dear organisers, you all were fantabulus. My wife and daughter are still in no mood to either cook or go to school. The new friends we made and the charming ladies I met cannot be cupped together in two palms like one does to water. ACA of the ladies kind must remember that I am a discipline case, so, not easy to control and handle but cheers to her effort. As she was listing out suggestions for improvements for the next bash at the airport, the only suggestion which came to my mind was that the horses should smell better, Johnny is witness to that. Narpat don’t mind as this is on the lighter side, because with the amount of food, snacks and liquid we ate and drank, we could only blame our smelly farts on the horses and muffled the musical farty notes in different octaves under the roar of the tornado’s.

can i buy viagra in france My sincere thanks to each person behind the scenes, the bands, the working parties, the drivers, the cooks, waiters and maslachi’s, the house keepers’ et al. Though we the RSI kinds were separated by locations but were united in the spirit of 66. Jaws still hurt, eyes get moistened both by the thought of the laughter we shared and the ache of separating from the bonds we made. So my friends let me say Au revoir, Dasvidaniya, sayonara, till we meet again. We have to meet again. Cheers friends and “girl friends”, hipipip hurray 66.

JAI HIND

© Noel Ellis

IN CASH AND BODY BAGS A SOLDIER PAYS HIS TAXES

 

I was going through the summary of the GST bill sent to me on social media. I came to know that it has been tabled as a “money bill”. Well it is all about money going out of my pocket so I tried to find out what does it mean. Folks I gave up moment I saw the text of the money bill. I suggest don’t waste your time looking at it. The gist is that Rajya Sabha has just to go through certain paces for formality sake on such bills. People there may fret and fume and pick faults in the bill but the last laugh will be had by Sir Jaitley and his team in the Lok Sabha as they can show a “THENGA” to the upper house. What the states are going to do is obviously clear. Resistance might be there from only non BJP states, so dear common man will it be good, bad or ugly for you, time will tell.

Be that as it may. I would like to know, will there be only one tax on my Colgate and Thums up? Not that I use any. Will my carry home income increase with this bill? Will my income tax reduce? Will goods be cheaper? Will availability of items increase from the PM to my Bai who may prefer to use a “daatun” instead of paste. For PM Sahib it is herbal and natural besides Baba Ramdev recommends it and for my bai it’s free and readily available from the jungle. No VAT and this that needs to be paid.

FM Sahib, you pay me a pay/pension depending whether I am serving or retired and you tax it at source. I have no issues with that. Then you lay down how much will be tax free and how much won’t be. No issues with that too. Then you lay down income slabs on a sliding scale, I grant you that also. You also give me ways and means to save my money under 80-100cc category or whatever. Tell me one thing, if I have to earn to save why I earn in the first instant. If I have to earn and put it back in a scheme then why is my pay scale fixed? Why don’t you lay down that this much amount will be reduced, this will be put in compulsory saving till you retire, and this much I will take back for the government? Period! Why do you want me to fill forms and show you how much you gave me and how much I owe you and how much I have paid you back, and in case if I don’t pay by 31st March you further add a penalty to it. What nonsense this is! My pay scales are fixed by you, then why keep deducting. Do it once for all and save me this tension of filing returns. Half the times I am posted at places where you don’t provide me the net and most of the times how hard I try I can’t make out head or tail what to fill in where, though you claim filing is a cake walk. My foot! Please save me this agony also sir like you are doing for the GST. Tax me once and then let me relax for life time.

I have some more issues with you sir. OK fine you tax my pay, pension now you tax my pension plus pay as I am now working for a corporate. Firstly, you put me at a disadvantage when I come to the civil world as I am seen as a person with double income. They don’t realise I gave 25 years or more for this nation unflinchingly and earned my pension. Secondly, certain people don’t want to pay taxes as they say most of it goes in the pay and pensions of people like me and the balance goes to feed all “sarkari damads” like the parliamentarians. Out of every rupee only some part reaches the beneficiary rest is siphoned off due to your enacted laws and poor administrative controls. I can forgive them as they know not what they say about me but you all need to find answers for your part.

If I have paid you the tax which was due on my pay and say I save some of it which I put it in FD, you charge me tax on its interest also. What the hell? Then you add that interest to my rest of the income and tax it again. If the scale tips over to the next tax bracket there is a quantum jump on the tax which I have to dish out. I decide to buy a house from my savings. I pay you tax again including all swach bharat, beti parhao, kissan cess etc. The bank’s loan me the amount and charge me interest where as my pay comes in that bank only.  You give me a tax rebate equivalent to peanuts on housing loan, where do I go? When builders fund you and your parties then no one opens his mouth but the builder opens his mouth wide when he charges me with all taxes and cess’ and half the thing he wants under the table. I buy a vehicle and for that I pay registration fee, insurance, road tax, environment tax and you name it. I paid so much of income tax to built roads then you charge me road tax besides you don’t let me off without paying toll tax too. Is it right? I go to a dhaba I pay no taxes on what I eat. I go to a restaurant and the last five lines are taxes and charges for what I ate. Depending on the type of eatery, they charge many times the amount for the ambiance and a waiter and you want me to pay the government of India for giving my daughter a treat. Isn’t it ironical FM sahib? I don’t mind paying for a rail ticket as the railways have definitely improved; unfortunately there has been an accident today.

If you really see the soldiers, they actually are paying taxes to the nation by putting their lives at stake for you people who don’t understand their worth and treat them as cannon fodder. One political decision to sort out Kashmir has been delayed by you for donkey’s years. How many more body bags would be sufficient? How many lost legs and limbs do you want? How many widows and orphans do you want for this nation to run in terms of taxes my dear sirs? Don’t we protect you in the close cordons when you as MPs move around in bullet proof cars? A man hangs on to a modified footrest to protect you and still you want us to pay taxes. If you are the chosen one of the people why do you need any protection from your own people?

You have one rank called MP, with one pay and one pension. You thrive on our money and want us to pay you both in cash and body count, how sad! You keep getting paid as you never feel like retiring. We soldiers take oath to dedicate ourselves to the nation even at the peril of our lives and you people want us to perpetually remain in peril and continue to be martyred without you people being harmed. We obey the rules laid down by you and you snatch away what we earn. We are still magnanimous to give you back enough in taxes and personal sacrifices, which you mismanage for obvious reasons. Some of us luckily survived, we have grown old and weak and silently sit at Jantar Mantar peacefully to make you realise that it is high time you gave us our due sirs. Are you listening yea members of parliament? I wonder!!!!!!!!!!!!

JAI HIND

© Noel Ellis

VIP VISITS

I did some coordination of transport and other things as a youngster in my unit during many inspections and visits. Invariably the drivers of VIPs were found missing from action at the very crucial moment when the VIP reached the mess gate after a mess function. Hell used to break lose, CO glaring at the 2IC, 2IC giving dirty looks to the Mess Secretary, Mess secretary showing eyes at the Mess Havildar, Mess Havildar having chepoed a few pegs after the dinner night beaming away grinning from ear to ear that he has no clue of any driver. 2Lt Noel Ellis the LO (Liaison Officer) at that very moment had to do the disappearing trick, as three guard checks were the minimum punishment as a reward for the “un-smooth” conduct of the visit.  How can a driver go missing? In those days I had no one on my left to look at being the junior most.

The wrath of that one minute delay in the appearance of the driver could attract mobilisation practice of the unit during Administrative inspections. The fear was not that we were not ready to be mobilised but the apprehension used to be  making of the last minute “shakkar-paras”, as many cooks used to sent on leave being weak in BPET (Battle Physical Efficiency Test). Inspecting officer had other options to show his rage by conducting complete BPETs, the way they were supposed to be done. For all those who feared falling in the 9 feet ditch or unable to climb the monkey rope after that grueling 2 mile run, there was only one person to blame and that was yours truly, for not ensuring the driver was present for the inspecting officers departure.

Matter didn’t end there as the driver would finally appear adjusting his zip, do a smart Jai Hind, open the staff car door and drive the inspecting officer away. One would see the VIP evaporate into the darkness on the empty unit road. The blinking of red light indicated the direction of his move and all of us praying that hope he doesn’t turn back and say “BENAZIR” (code word for the unit to be mobilised). Noel Saab would be standing in “Savdhan” outside the mess in 6B (Ceremonial mess dress), with the “Kamar Band” about to burst after a heavy intake of tipsy pudding, listening to the night cap of bullshit from at least four seniors for not having ensured  the driver’s availability at the correct time and the correct place. They would suggest 30 ways of ensuring it with live examples. This ensured that one rushed to the bar rather than the bed so that liquor could wash the heavy dose of love and affection showered on you. Good old days.

The whole of next week was guaranteed to be screwed conducting night guard checks. Besides, another punishment dished out used to be to write a SOP on how to ensure that the VIP driver is available with the vehicle at the crucial moment. The text of the SOP would include “As the COs piper comes in to play, the RP Havildar should line up the vehicles”. A field urinal shall be provided in the parking for drivers for obvious reasons so that they don’t do the magician’s disappearing trick. Its location should not attract attention of the VIP and should be well camouflaged; however a night sign and an arrow marker to indicate the direction of the same should be prominently displayed. This diagrammatic layout will be attached to Mess SOP Part 2 on Parking and Driver Management as Appendix ‘A’ to Annexure ‘Q’. Good old unit days and a limit of idiosyncrasies we could do.

I remember once we were supposed to receive the Corps commander at the field firing ranges, I was the food member and officiating Adjutant. The CO worked out an elaborate plan including a sumptuous continental breakfast. Unit Ladies were made bakers overnight. All generators in Jaisalmer district were shifted to the officer’s colony and all ovens on this side of Suez were “begged-borrowed or stolen”. People were dispatched to various places to collect cocktail sausages, salami’s and anything tinned. Well, I was busy doing nothing, just trying to avoid the CO as I used to be on the firing line for every fault of anyone in the unit. From the 73 mm gun getting stuck to the milk supply 3 Ton getting punctured used to be my fault.

My only friend was Ghooma Ram the special mess cook with whom I used to share a Bidi in the make shift kitchen. He told me Corps Cdr Saab ko ye sab sho-sha bazi pasand nahi (The Corps Cdr doesn’t like all this). I am going to make aloo paratha and a thick glass of lassi. By joe, I was impressed and asked his secret for such confidence. He revealed that he was posted as cook to the GOC when he was in Hissar. Well, as usual 2Lt Noel Ellis was observing the fun from the background on D-Day. Lo and behold the continental menu was not even sampled by him. He asked for an aloo paratha. Along came the lassi and moment he tasted it he said who has made it. Out came Ghooma Ram, who got a Jhappi from the GOC and left the complete unit flabbergasted especially the CO. I waited for the seniors to clear the field mess and then I had a ball and enjoyed huge portions of every item on the menu.

Well, the General was impressed by the Malutka missile firing. However he was not with the RLs, (Rocket Launchers). There was no need to guess who was made the in-charge of the RL team once back home in Jaisalmer, it was yours truly again. Thus, one complete summer was spent on the RL firing range in the desert in service of this nation.

Well, as a 2Lt this was part of grooming. Basically, we learnt how to ensure a smooth conduct of dignitaries during any visit. We learnt how to organise banquets in the midst of nowhere. It displayed an ethos of the unit that though it may sound ridiculous but to what minute details we planned and catered for any event and also we should be ready for surprises too. Do such things still happen in the Army? I hope by now every SOP would have been written, or are there some left, I wonder!!!!!!!!!!

JAI HIND

© Noel Ellis

JAANE KYA TUNE KAHI

I just happened to flick channels the other day and saw one Brigadier of the Pakistan Army whispering something in the ear of Mr Nawaz Sharif in the SCO meeting while the latter was delivering his speech. It reminded me of the hindi song “JAANE KYA TUNE KAHI, JANE KYA MAINE SUNI” (I don’t know what you said and I don’t know what I heard). I think it became a matter of conjecture for the media that what must he have whispered that the PM had to pull out his ear plug from the left ear and listen to the Brigadier from the right one. During the process, why did Nawaz Sharif raise his eye brows as if something big might have happened back home? Well, there could be many theories on the issue, so let me also speculate a few matters of National importance for the Military Secretary (MS) to whisper in the PMs ear in the middle of an address.

I kept scratching my head and am sharing a few, that sir your favourite bitch has littered, or your SUV has been stolen, or sir tuhadi MAJH suu gayi hai (your buffalo has given birth to a JHOTA or calf). Well, I think this is too much reading between the lines. Then I pondered that would this whisper be to say that Pakistan has launched 100 terrorists from POK. Well, that is a routine that Pakistan has adopted and is facing the music the way Indian Army has unleashed its intolerance to terrorism and cease-fire violations recently.

There are a few more shockers that the Brigadier could have given him. One was that sir WAPDA (Water and Power Development Authority of Pakistan) has just intimated that electricity has come to the PMs Residence. The frown on Nawaz Sharif’s face clearly showed that kind of surprise that is it possible? Another thing which the Brigadier may have whispered in his ears that madam has just whatsapped that the water in the main Tanki has finished. The frown was justified because he had made the irrigation minister personally responsible to keep Madam Sharif well bathed in his absence. He later realised that madam was accompanying him then who the hell is this new “begum” sending messages from his bathroom to his MS.

I think matters would be more serious than this. Oh yes, it is our national problem too. Madam could have sent a message that today the Bai has not come. All heavens would have broken lose in Pakistan because PMs Bai is absent. The whole of MS branch must be busy posting one as replacement. Following this another bai would have messaged the Brigadier that what would the PM like to have for dinner, “Bharwan-Bhindi” or “vegetarian Biryani? I heard he is a vegetarian. For which the MS would have to interrupt the speech so that he could intimate her keeping the duration of flight and the time the Dum Biryani would require cooking. The worst news could be that now after the Panama leaks the Suez leaks have been revealed to the world in which some person called Nawaz Sharif is the main accused. Or was it that the PM is no more the PM as General Javed Bajwa has taken over because he too is fed up of power cuts and every time a presentation on Indian Army is given to him the bloody lights go off. Well it all boils down to, jane kya tune kahi?

One of the news readers pointed out that the MS came to tell the PM that transport to depart to the airport is ready. How ridiculous can ridiculous be? PM wants a Brigadier to keep him informed about his transport. What a luxury it is! Then I kept thinking what was his Military Secretary doing in a conference which has got to do with nothing military in the first place. A very powerful leader of a country with a mighty military called China did not have his personal body guards so to say and here Nawaz Sharif has a Brigadier doing his transport coordinator. I am impressed.

On a serious note, I was also thinking that the urgency to inform the PM right in the middle was to tell him in those 19 seconds that Sir Cdr Kulbhushan Yadav has escaped from our custody and is in Indian hands. Our game is up; transport is waiting outside, let us run moment you finish before the Indian PM tears us apart.  You may like to make a statement against India now and then let us scoot. Well, my conjecturing and guessing can have no end nor will the news debates stop discussing it. This mystery can only be solved by the two people involved and no one else. I shall wait for the confessions in a book.

I think I should leave it there as it cannot be a Brigadier coordinating transport for the PM at an international meeting in any case. Let them play the game of “Chinese whispers” the Pakistani khus-phus way? I can understand that these Pakis can only speak in whispers when Indian PM is present, so why are we interested in their whispering affairs, I wonder!!!!!!!!

JAI HIND

© Noel Ellis

HOW DARE YOU TARNISH MY ARMY CHIEF’S NAME

http://gsc-research.de/blog/blog/post/2009/02/27/fuchs-ueberrascht-positiv-selbst-uns/index.html It was the saddest day in my life to hear someone calling my Army Chief a thug. Well to be frank Mr DICKSHIT (D-S) you have stooped to the lowest low in my eyes and in the eyes of my fraternity. A man who once falls from grace will never be able to change my opinion about him. As it is I somehow cannot tolerate the political class and you have ensured that I stick to my view. I do not know your educational qualifications or your political achievements and I am not interested in them either but you be rest assured you need to be paraded on Republic Day on a donkey with a blackened face, sitting facing the Rashtrapati Bhawan with a garland of boots soaked in muck. With every beat of the drum you should be hit by the butt of a rifle by every marching soldier.

metformin rezept Every man in uniform has to not only protect himself from enemies across the borders, besides insurgents and terrorists but from anti-India citizens like you also. Who needs enemies when we have people like you within? I don’t care which party you belong to or what political affiliations you have. I don’t want to know what your frustration is or against. I don’t want to even understand your point of view at all now. I don’t want any clarifications either. If you still continue to justify what you said then please walk across the borders to the west. That is where you belong and moment you will turn back to return the Indian soldier will make so many holes in you that even the vultures will refuse to do what they are supposed to do.

watch Mr D-S you have questioned an institution of our Nation. He is a person who safeguards this country’s integrity and sovereignty. You have called names to a person who ensures that you have a bloody pillow under your head every night. Just because you have become a politician, just because you were elected to some parliament that you have grown beyond your boots to make such uncouth comments about a man who if mobilises his resources is capable of obliterating a country form the maps of the world. You think you can open your dirty mouth and get away with treason. How dare you even think of uttering such statements in your dream? Same goes for all those politicians and peaceniks who are yapping on the same lines.

follow Please leave politics now, as moment I hear your name my BP shoots to 240/160. It is politicians like you who have treated us soldiers like cannon fodder and we like bloody fools have been sacrificing our lives for ungrateful people like you. I hope you know that a group of monkeys is called a congress; I shall go further to say a group of buffoons if not baboons also mean the same. Don’t mind my saying so, because I am so deeply hurt by what you have said.

go here I have to also tell my media friends, yaar please, why you take statements of people who cannot even spell the word gun? Such people do not know the meaning of oath; leave alone the contents of the oath we the people of the forces take. Such people are capable of only disrespecting our national institutions and flag whereas media should see how our “NISHAN TOLI” carries the national flag (Nishan of India) with utmost respect and dignity. Such people may only know a fish tank and will crap in their pants if a battle tank fires. These people who express such opinions without understanding the gravity of what they are saying are the biggest holes of the shitty kind. So dear media you may now show solidarity with the Army and Army Chief alright but the damage has been done. Why don’t you shove mikes in the suggested hole I mention of such people? Don’t make a mockery by running tickers, headlines and debates on such matters which demeans the forces further. Don’t make us news fodder; we deserve better treatment if the Media really has any respect for its Army Chief and Armed forces.

conocer mujer linda There is a saying in fauj that once you press the trigger the round is fired. It cannot be brought back. Either the bullet hits the target or misses it but if it hits the wrong target shit flies and here you have Mr D-S and his ilk flying in all directions; stinking and spreading disease. A person who has no idea how we as a fraternity work has no business to air his opinion. He is free to express his outrage against the Modi government. He may express his disagreement about government policies he doesn’t like but his lowly opinion about the highest rank of the Army cannot be accepted. He is no one to comment on such respectable people. I think it is for the same reason that diapers and politicians need to be changed after some time, time has now come Mr D-S.

https://dunkl.co.at/deposti/1908 I feel humiliated that 22 years of my life I protected people like you. I think this freedom of speech and freedom of press has gone too far. You are worse than a rapist Mr D-S, verbal rapist to be precise. I can only say, you are worst than a thug, who has tried to cheat the nation by uttering such words. You need to be sacked from the Indian political scene with immediate effect. You should be tried for treason, tied in front of a QRT vehicle till such time the militants get their aim right.

http://azortin.pl/?rtysa=opcje-binarne-gdzie-jest-haczyk&820=c1 I salute Gen Rawat for leading our Army as a thorough bred professional. Sir, Bash on regardless. I also request the “congress” to remove this man for shaming the impeccable institution such as the Army Chief who has such a great responsibility towards the nation and has been delivering it always and every time. Will this D-S realise the damage he has done, I wonder!!!!!!!!

JAI HIND

© Noel Ellis

I LOVE DR ROY BUT NOT THE MEDIA

 

I still remember the good old Doordarshan days when the same bearded man used to present “The World This Week”. It used to be a treat to listen to him. As time went by we used to wait for a cassette of “NEWS TRACK”, which used to come free with the yearly subscription of India Today. Besides the news coverage it was more to watch Madhu Trehan. Madam please take it as a compliment. The shape of news, views and discussions changed over the years. One can call it an evolution of the fourth estate. From gagging of the media during emergency and what it is today, it is a total transformation. We now have big fights, we kick each other left, right and center, and we also have to bear with the noise hour. There was one guy who used to be the devil’s advocate too. Mirch, masala, fresh tadka is the only way for any news channel to survive. I have had my share of love and hate kind of relationship with the way media is doing its job. I stopped watching WWF fights on news debates long back as the whole time it appeared fake, cooked up and playing to the galleries. What I want to highlight today is how a media house can be so pious and holy that they are feeling bad when they have been raided by the IT department.

“We the people” today are very much aware how the media houses function. “Sold” is a mild word is the general perception. However neutral they may claim to be, however outspoken they may assert to be, however frank and honest they may say they are, however candid and blunt their opinions may be, however fearless and daring news feeds they might deliver, however loudly they may outshout the co-panelists’, however they may claim to get the highest TRP ratings and eye balls from figures plucked out of thin air, however smart and good looking newsreaders and debate conductors might be. I am convinced as a common man that every channel has an agenda; every channel wants to claim they broke the news first. Thank God they are not deployed along the security forces otherwise they may stake claims that they are the first ones to shoot the enemy and the terrorists.

Here starts my bone of contention, Dr Roy not with you but with the media as such. It is the way media people have degraded the armed forces by airing whatever media thought is right. Earlier I never used to see any retired defence personnel on TV but then a new trend in journalism started. Many retired officers joined the ranks of media houses and used their links and pinks to get as much information they could for news to sell. There came a time when the newsreaders were in bunkers when the Kargil war happened. People were covering ground zero in Afghanistan. Ex Indian Army officers were invited to the glaciers, aircraft carriers, submarines etc. With this exposure and intimacy to the forces grew and matured. Then some channels in the garb of freedom of speech started tarnishing the armed forces in public. Here I started to veer off the news and the anchors conducting such shows.

Well, if you can put the armed forces to scrutiny from the chopper scam, to intelligence failures, to tactical mistakes, to human rights violations, to ketchup Colonels, to booze Brigadiers, to date of births issues, to equipment and procurement scams, to watery dal, to encounter killings, to eliminating the Burhan wani kinds, to tying a stone pelter to the jeep, basically after getting a foothold into the military environment and to try and sneak into all matters military which the media have no business to open their mouth about. This has resulted in so much of morale shattering air time that words cannot describe. So why there is an issue when media is being scrutinised under the tax mans lens.

NDTV has put out the news that it is political vendetta because a BJP spokesperson was shooed out of one show. Well, so be it. People like Brakha Dutt when she was with NDTV went to cover the poor school teachers kid called burhan wani and the plight of his family and various other people affected by pellets and bullets. She made her career covering Kargil war sitting with Capt Vikram Batra saying “ye dil mange more” to shoot to fame. Well, it now pains me to see the way news anchors have torn apart our army and Army Chief when he said what he had to say about the militants, stone pelters and their supporters. I think the media has grown too big for its boots and such raids serve them right. Media needs to be put into place, let it be Dr Roy or any media head for that matter. Who is a congress supporter or a BJP supporter is not the issue either? The issue is who maligns and tarnishes the image of the armed forces. Yes media may claim that they have done many welfare programmes for the armed forces. Well let me tell you it is no big shake to get Priyanka, Priety or Anushka to the operational areas. They are kids of the forces and they will oblige anytime to boost the morale of the forces, maybe at their own cost unlike your sponsors.

I had been following the news channels which used to bring the Pakis for debates in the prime time. Initially I enjoyed when many of our panelists’ gave them a good amount of bashing but soon those guys got the hang of it and gave it back. They had the audacity to call my country and its Prime Minster names, thanks to the media. We were abused and threatened by those pipsqueaks, which was again not palatable to me. All this was done in the garb of a balanced debating. The amount of disservice that can be done to this nation and the way they abused our decorated veterans was pathetic the least I can say. Enough is enough.

Well, I am not in favour of such a free press where any news anchor can speak poorly about the armed forces or admonish a member of parliament or a politician live on air. These MPs sit there and can do nothing about it as they cannot take “pangas” with the media. Well, Media people, you may show your arrogance, misbehaviour, manner less attitude etc to the politicians but kindly leave the people in uniform and veterans alone. We toil for you so that you can air your programmes, remember that. Media doesn’t save the nations integrity; it is the man on the border who does. You may fire your bites on air but the person who faces the enemy’s bullets with petty perks and privileges’ remains in the background and anonymity. He is asking for his well deserved one rank one pension which you people have just not given any coverage because it didn’t matter to the media. How sad! I suggest the government should raid all the media houses today and tell them to take a swallow of the same bitter pill they have been dishing out to the forces. Will the media act responsibly in future? I wonder!!!!!!!!

JAI HIND

© Noel Ellis

WHO CARES FOR MOM

Today it is shutters down for the milkmen and the sabziwalas of Maharashtra. The Bhindi which was selling at 20 bucks a kg has shot up to 80. Thank God I had picked up a big 50 kg bori of onions so at least my dal will have a tarka but rest of the vegetables and milk prices have sky rocketed. My milkman has gone out of coverage area. Even after repeated calls one gets to hear the same recorded message. I am sure he needs to sell milk but he is under pressure if he carries those two small little dolus to our place. Drain cocks of milk vans have been opened on the roads so let us no more cry over spilt milk. Doodh ki nadiyan (rivers of milk) were bahoing literally. Any vendor trying to sneak in with veges was also being targeted. Well, I do not see anything but vegetarian in milk and vegetables. Then why are we creating such a hullabaloo. Well friends of all the things it is the cow, leather and beef responsible.

For things non vegetarian, the vegetarians are going to suffer. People like me will still continue to relish fish and chicken but what are the vegetarians going to eat if this agitation continues. Reason is a self created save the cow policy. We still have not moved from the middle ages of guy hamari mata hai. So let mom be mom and she needs to be respected irrespective whether the poor man dies without his basic needs of food. Let the children be deprived of the milk they deserve. Let the cobbler use plastic and ragzine to mend your shoes, let the “mothers” roam on the road and be hit by trucks and cars. Let mothers eat the poly bags lying on the streets. Let us Indians suffer at the hands of another kind of extremism. Let us have an independent state of “guyistaan”. Like the ISIS now we have footprints of GRIS (Gow Rakshaks of Indian State) creating mayhem.

Is all this making any sense to anyone? Can a country whose PM is visiting countries which eat beef as their staple diet be boycotted to protest against their anti India feelings? When something happens to an animal whom I consider to be my mother shouldn’t India go to war with them? Shouldn’t India ban all products and produce of that nation? Shouldn’t India take this matter up with the UN or ask for a Cow protection force to monitor atrocities on cows. Shouldn’t India ask for aid from all countries who support us with green grass, fodder and cattle feed for the millions of cows that it has to look after. Shouldn’t India ban the “vilaayati-mem” so to say and let the desi-gai be the only one acceptable to give milk. Aren’t we spoiling our culture by bringing western sabhyata to the Indian soil by importing all the Holstein and Jersey cows from all over the place? It is shameful that such cows roam freely with such huge udders that it gives a complex to the Indian cows.

In some states of India cow is not considered anything but an animal. Biology says it is an animal, the world says it is an animal. It looks to me like an animal, then why suddenly everyone has to start quoting the constitution of India what it says about the cow. Till the time we don’t develop our mental faculties this won’t change. Till the time we don’t change to a modern outlook this shall continue. Till the time we have sadus and sadvis calling the shots we will have issues. The politicians shall continue to exploit sentiments. I ask is it acceptable to produce five to ten litres of milk from a desi cow instead of 40-60 litres from a foreign cow a day. Is it fine to have 150 kgs of beef rather than having 300 kgs from an imported animal? Will it be better to produce 10 litres of urine or have 25kgs of dung per cow per day? Or will it be more useful to have 15-20 litres of urine and 40-50 kgs of dung per day? Will it be ok to have 4 square meters of hide per cow or 8-10 sq meters? Well if the quality of all the stuff the Indian cow is producing is 200 times better than the foreign cows then it should be considered to breed our own indigenous ones only. However, when we need to feed so many mouths, let us be practical. Milk and a cheap meal is a basic necessity today.

I am definitively not suggesting that our own breeds be wiped out. They need to be preserved. I would rather suggest that let us have some method in this cow madness. The disease of cow vigilantism is spreading like the mad cow disease, which needs to be curbed and stopped with immediate effect. The industries linked to the cows also need to be safeguarded. If we link it to religion we shall go nowhere. A farmer cannot afford to hold on to lame or sick animal. The farmer cannot feed them or afford the medicines when the animal is ill. Government today cannot look after its humans so looking after its numerous free roaming mothers is farfetched.

Well, we Indians are very Hippocratic about everything. Till the time it doesn’t affect us, we have no issues. We also are very fanatic as far as religious ideology is concerned. We start quoting the constitution when we want to otherwise do not even know the contents of that document. We are pseudo as far as culture is concerned; we want to preserve the traditional values but with a modern outlook. We will watch porn, but will not allow lovers to kiss in public. We are pretentious when it comes to our sensitivities. We can fake our feelings to hurt other people. We want to portray our country as a superpower as we launch rockets with satellites but cannot portray it beyond snake charming and the great Indian rope trick. Well we are a bogus kind of people, because we do not have either our aim clear or our priorities right. We the people, if don’t act intellectually, we shall definitely lose all of them to this dirty politics over cows. We need to free it from disease, ill health, ill treatment, neglect, and sheer useless vigilantism.

I hope in my India we can breathe freely, drink freely, wear freely, watch freely, live freely, speak freely, read freely, eat freely, follow our religions freely, travel freely and above all be free from all religious and political hatred. Till the time we let ourselves be manipulated by the politicians, neither will mother cow be looked after nor will this country progress. When will all this madness end? I wonder!!!!!!!!!

🇮🇳 JAI HIND 🇮🇳

© Noel Ellis

BLACK COAT COMMANDOS

Isn’t it ironical that all the prime witnesses of the Babri Masjid demolition have got bail? A case of 1992 has come up for its conclusion in 2017. The courts have yet given two more years to finally decide on this case, meaning it will take 27 years to conclude that no one is guilty. I am sure many witnesses would be in their graves by then or will be so old that the court may decide to grant them pardon on compassionate grounds. Well, I am not for or against any Temple or Masjid but I am definitely disillusioned with our judicial system and its process. There is a law of the land. There is a rule book. There are the people who did it which can be seen on tape. There were leaders supporting it. People saw a building being broken brick by brick. That is why I ask, what this due process of law is? There was a judicial commission made and it recommended certain things. Why have they not been considered or brought to its conclusion till date?

One more thing I cannot understand in India is that people who were candidates for Prime Minister, one has been a Chief Minister and in fact are sitting members of the present parliament today, besides being sadhus and sadhavis basically “holy” men and women: if such people start “lying” because their lawyers have twisted the whole facts upside down doesn’t gel with me. They act as if they did not hear, see or utter a word on the issue. These people who have been part of the law making process for India do not have the moral courage to own up and say yes we did it for whatever reasons; popular support, political pressure, emerging as a leader, honouring the manifesto, being swayed away by the wave of that time, whatever. At least say it, own up and be done with it. God save our judiciary, democracy and this country if such trends continue. The longest running commission called the Liberhan Commission concluded the whole issue but in vain. After the passage of so much of time do the courts think that such prominent leaders would remember what they said and did. In so many years a generation would have changed, the lawyers and the judges would have changed. Are we doing justice or hog wash is the question I want to ask?

If an open and shut case of Kasab can take four years to hang then I can understand why this case has taken so long. From lodging of an FIR, to being produced in front of a magistrate if the time given is 24 hours, then what is so great in finishing cases in the same time frame by all the courts? Why do we then teach law is my basic question? Is it to twist the truth? Is it to camouflage the facts? Is it to ensure guilty be left roaming scot free? Or is it to earn regular income by lawyers? Or are the Courts justifying their existence thus? The long list of pending cases adds to the woes and miseries of the genuine people. A murderer sentenced to death can appeal to the President of India, who may not react to the appeal. Cases then shall never end.

I do not know if we do periodically review the number of guilty in our jails. Why there are delays in trying people? If the maximum limit of any charge is say 7 years, are there people who are still languishing in jails beyond that? If so, why are they not let free? On one side our judicial process is so super slow and on the other side our jailing process appears to be cockeyed. In India jail to prisoners’ ratio is remarkable. There is no place inside and we keep adding people. Then claim we taught them to make candles, yoga, biscuits and bread. Well, before these people turned criminals, why hasn’t our systems trained them to earn a living. They wouldn’t have become criminals in the first place. 24 hours in jail terms is two days. I don’t understand the logic at all.

Today, we have people giving on the spot punishments, like the IIT student who went for a beef festival. Akhlak, who stored some kind of meat at home or the valentine day squad making boys and girls to do squats and the cow vigilantes groups who are most active today etc. But we do not prevent fraud, corrupting, deceit, at all levels including the judiciary. If our issue is resolved we don’t care if we used hook or crook. We move on. If we can delay somehow the “Tareekh” at the court, even by producing fake medical certificates, of the lawyer, the accused or both at different times, the hearing automatically keeps getting delayed. The judge changes, the jury changes and our system continues like hither to fore but law stays blind as blind can be.

Be that as it may, I not a qualified person on law and have no justification to comment on the judicial process or the judiciary but as a layman and common Indian I feel that there is too much amiss. Today, if the internet network becomes slow all our faculties go berserk. If need be we will climb on the mobile tower to get that one danda on the network, but just look at our judicial processes, 27 years to understand that what was done, who did it and why it was done, who instigated it, who are guilty and who should be taken to task. All this will happen after thousands of witnesses will be re-examined. I want to salute the patience of the judges, the patience of the defence lawyer, and hats off to the lawyers who are turning this case on its head. I hope it doesn’t turn out in the end that Babar turned in his grave and thus the Masjid self destructed. The people who had climbed up the domes were actually trying to save each brick. The instigators, who are out on bail now, were actually standing there to witness a miracle that how does a Masjid automatically transforms into a Mandir. The speeches they were making were actually divine chants which empower the creator to do such miracles. The police were mute spectators of the blind, deaf and dumb kind.

I think I need to rest my case as nothing in India will move without an affidavit on a stamp paper, a notary’s signature, a lawyer, a judge and the most important person in all this drama is the typist, who has to key in 40,000 words dictated verbatim at lightning speed by his bosses and keep a record of the same. Many of my uniformed community have now joined the “black coat commandos”, I wish them luck. I wish by 2025 we would have no pending cases in any court. Is it possible? I wonder!!!!!!!!!

JAI HIND

© Noel Ellis

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén